I was sitting here just now looking around my house and realising.. I have a lot of stuff.
No, not stuff. Crap.
I hate it all. Everything I own. Sometimes I think about how liberating it would feel if I only just collected it all, brought it outside, and had a magnificent bonfire. Let the memories burn away with the flames.
Occasionally I try to purge my life of unnecessary belongings which I feel are slowly throttling me, and as I go through it thoughts like ‘oh I can’t get rid of that, that’s when yada bla bla happened.’ Or ‘wow that’s such a great little trinket from when I went on that trip that one time. I should keep it, better let it sit neglected in this dark box for another few years.’
I mean it’s getting ridiculous. I have clothes I haven’t worn in years, clothes I bought and never wore, trinkets from elementary school, and tons of books. Books from uni, books I read as a kid, books I hate, books I still have to read, cookbooks. There are binders, boxes, cables, wires for ancient computers, plugs for phones I don’t use anymore, phones I don’t use anymore.. I could go on. But you get the point.
Part of it is I don’t know what to do about certain things. Like wires and phones. What the hell do you do with them? I don’t want to just throw them out. I think there’s a way to recycle them, but I don’t know where or how. I’m too lazy to look into the matter so I just think I’ll do it later.
The worst is the sentimental things. I have a cardigan that my grandmother bought me when I was 11.. I am in my 20s now. I have always hated this cardigan and have never once worn it (sorry, Grandma. RIP.) Every time I think I should donate it I feel this overwhelming sensation of guilt. Like my Grandma will somehow manage to be sad even though she’s been gone for years.
And I have a Furby. That’s right, a Furby.
If you don’t know what that looks like go ahead and google it. It’s one of those hideous little talking toys from way back in the day (although I think they have since made a comeback.) Every time I look at its stupid face I wonder why it’s there yet I never get rid of it. Annoyingly it still works, and every now and then someone accidentally tips it over and you hear it waking up, making its yawning noises, and asking to play. This happened the other day when my boyfriend stumbled upon it. I yelled out Noooooooooooo! very dramatically because once it wakes up it takes FOREVER to put back to sleep. My dogs started barking because of course they don’t understand what could possibly be making such inane sounds. I ended up sitting there for countless minutes like a pathetic minion holding my hand over the Furby’s light sensor so that it would sleep and shut up. All the while my dogs are barking their heads off and the Furby is singing “lalalalalala” to itself and wiggling its dumb ears up and down. I mean it’s been a while since I was in the 6-9 year old demographic. HOW HAVE YOU BEWITCHED ME, FURBY?!
I am moving in a month and a half, and when I go I want to go with a clean slate. I don’t want to bring all this baggage along with me. I am cluttered to the core. So over the next couple of weeks I am going to have to learn to be brutal with my possessions. Even the thought that I won’t have any of this crap around anymore makes me feel lighter somehow. I don’t need things to keep memories, I should just write down the important ones instead of keeping them around in the form of stuff that piles up around me. I should learn to be a minimalist.
How do you deal with your excess stuff?
14 thoughts on “I hate my stuff”
I hate getting rid of anything. I always tell myself I’ve obviously held onto it for a reason, and I’m going to want it again someday…
That is exactly me. Sometimes I have said that about ribbons and stupid things that I thought were nice on packaging/presents.. and I thought I should keep it in case I ever become crafty.
Now that I own a big house, I have plenty of room for everything. I’m terribly sentimental, so I just can’t let go of things. I’m not talking in a hoarder kind of way…just in a romantic, endearing kind of way.
That sounds like the kind of sentimental that is reasonable 🙂
taehreh, I had nearly the same issue as you. I came up with a solution that I could live with. I keep a memories box, the size has changed over the last couple of years, and I’m okay with that. I take a picture of the object, or a few pictures, and then create a document, I just write about my memories of the object. Everything I can think of at the time. I print up the document with the pictures and put it in a notebook. The notebook goes in the box.
Then I take the smallest piece of whatever material object (such as cutting a 3 inch by 3 inch patch out of a sweater) I put that small piece of the memory inside the box also. Then I get rid of the rest.
The perfect solution is to own a museum of my memories. Since that isn’t possible, I’ve had to make due. Cool Runnings 🙂
That is a great solution! I’m sure the memories mean more when you’ve taken the time to write about them, rather than just trying to remember them years later. I’ll be starting to pack things up for my move in a few weeks and will definitely do this. Thanks for the suggestion 🙂
hehe! i dont really hate my stuff, i just hate it when its time to move to another hostel (i am in campus) and i have to carry all that stuff! i am a sucker for shoes and clothes- i always give away my clothes at the end of each semester only to go get some more cuz having many means i dont have to wash them for a month or so! books are my hardest things to declutter- i CLING to them! anyway, i plan to start exchanging but that means having yet anither book. i kinda gave up on decluttering books. shoes- not giving if they fit! 🙂 clothes- i give em away cuz i can always get more! plus it gives me reason to shop yet again 😉
The only people who are truly free are those with nothing left to lose.
I move, I leave some of it behind.
I know this feeling too well. I recently downsized to move overseas and left a lot of things I really regret behind. So much of the stuff I brought needs to go. I have about 4 bags for donation. At the airport I had about 10lbs of things I had to throw away… the stuff is never ending.
It sure feels that way. Despite the progress I’ve made I still feel like I’m drowning sometimes. One bag of donation at a time though, right! We’ll get there.
That’s amazing that you’ve moved overseas!! One of my dreams.
Glad you like my haiku post. More will come and when I am over the haiku adventure, who knows what is next.